"My Perfect First Cosplay" blues

*Sigh*

Well, as I had mentioned previously, I wanted to make a Dark Phoenix costume for the Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo (CCEE). Last week, I received 2 packages pertaining to my costume: the body suit and the boots. I was excited for both! ... until I tried them on.

I was swimming in the body suit, which was disappointing to say the least. I gave them measurements, weight, and everything. Not only that but I asked for no head attachment and they sent me a suit with the head attached. I was willing to make compromises and fix it myself, but why should I? I wasn't in the wrong... I had ordered it to my specifications and received the wrong item! So, I sent it back... it cost $20 to send it back, and I'm still waiting on word as to whether or not I'll get some of that money compensated. =(

The boots look absolutely fabulous. Unfortunately, my fat calves make it so that I can't zip them up. I tell you, I was so heartbroken. I thought I was making real progress with my weight loss, and even earlier that day commented on how good my legs looked. *Sigh*

... For most of the afternoon, I was on the verge of tears. I felt so bad about myself and disappointed about the situation. Unless I get the suit back in time and lose weight in my calves, I won't be able to do my cosplay for this years' CCEE.

I do want this to be my perfect first cosplay, so I would rather it be right than half-assed and lame. I know this now, thinking logically and not at the peak of my negative emotions. But last week was full of sadness. It probably didn't help that I had 3 tests that week (and another 3 at the beginning of this week). Now that I'm out of the onslaught, I can think a little more reasonably and think a bit more positively. If it doesn't work this year, oh well. Next year will be even better because I'll have time to prepare better, plan better, and a whole year extra of weight loss.

And that, to me, matters more than showing off a nice costume to Stan Lee... *Bites lip* ... there may very well be other opportunities... right?