"My Perfect First Cosplay" blues

*Sigh*

Well, as I had mentioned previously, I wanted to make a Dark Phoenix costume for the Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo (CCEE). Last week, I received 2 packages pertaining to my costume: the body suit and the boots. I was excited for both! ... until I tried them on.

I was swimming in the body suit, which was disappointing to say the least. I gave them measurements, weight, and everything. Not only that but I asked for no head attachment and they sent me a suit with the head attached. I was willing to make compromises and fix it myself, but why should I? I wasn't in the wrong... I had ordered it to my specifications and received the wrong item! So, I sent it back... it cost $20 to send it back, and I'm still waiting on word as to whether or not I'll get some of that money compensated. =(

The boots look absolutely fabulous. Unfortunately, my fat calves make it so that I can't zip them up. I tell you, I was so heartbroken. I thought I was making real progress with my weight loss, and even earlier that day commented on how good my legs looked. *Sigh*

... For most of the afternoon, I was on the verge of tears. I felt so bad about myself and disappointed about the situation. Unless I get the suit back in time and lose weight in my calves, I won't be able to do my cosplay for this years' CCEE.

I do want this to be my perfect first cosplay, so I would rather it be right than half-assed and lame. I know this now, thinking logically and not at the peak of my negative emotions. But last week was full of sadness. It probably didn't help that I had 3 tests that week (and another 3 at the beginning of this week). Now that I'm out of the onslaught, I can think a little more reasonably and think a bit more positively. If it doesn't work this year, oh well. Next year will be even better because I'll have time to prepare better, plan better, and a whole year extra of weight loss.

And that, to me, matters more than showing off a nice costume to Stan Lee... *Bites lip* ... there may very well be other opportunities... right?

Emotions... So many positive emotions

So this week has been incredible. So much awesome stuff. I'm about to share it all with you, of course.

First of all, the Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo is going to be fricken AWESOME this year. Pretty much everyone going is amazing. I'm so serious. Check out the list of guests here. I'm probably most excited to see the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Stan Lee, Katee Sackhoff, Jake the Snake, and James Marsters. But to name a few.

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When I learned that Stan Lee was coming to the Expo, I decided to take on another costume: Dark Phoenix. I would love to get a picture with him in this costume. Jean Gray as always been one of my favourite Marvel characters (along with Spiderman and Gambit). I did some searching around for some costume supplies and it's going to be an expensive costume for sure. There's nothing I can make cheaply other than the phoenix crest on her chest and the shawl around her waist. Everything else I need to buy independently and kind of put it all together. What this means is "expensive." The boots will come to at least $70 (on the plus side, many of the descriptions included the words 'stripper' and 'pole dancer,' so I guess I could always use them if I wanted to do a pole dance routine... x.x).

I'm still gunna work on my Terra costume. In fact, I bought some beads for her belt chain around her waist earlier in the week. Still looking for the red fabric for her dress, though... =(

Second of all, I was offered an opportunity to sell my crafts at the CCEE through a company called Project X. Discussions are still in the works, though after seeing the guest line up, I have no idea if I'll be able to do work it in. I'm definitely going to see what I can do. Maybe the guests could all come visit me at the booth. =P

Also, I got a wicked letter in the mail replying to some of the questions posed in the GTKYFB swap I participated in last week from my friend, Andrea (@lightmoonstone). Pretty much the coolest person ever.
PS: When you said your favourite TV show was Seinfeld, we were TOTALLY watching Seinfeld. <3
PPS: I love mail and penpals! Shooooot! <3

Finally, and probably the most emotion-filling thing yet, is the fact that I've had so many people tell me how much of an inspiration I am. As some of you know, I do a weekly weight loss vlog. I utilized some of the concepts I learned from Social Psychology to stick to a workout regime: namely the idea of commitment to a community to stick with goals. And the craziest thing happened... I had people come up to me, telling me how much I've inspired them! I can't believe it. I'm so humbled. Still a bit shy about it all, but.. I dunno. That was the best feeling, being told I inspired someone to improve their way of life.

It's times like this where I know my mum is proud of me and what I've done for myself and others. All of this was a nice turnaround, as lately I've been having just a crumby time with some of my friendships.

So... needless to say, I've been experiencing a ton of varying emotions this week: excitement, happiness, awe, humbleness, determination, and most of all, love.

Thank you. <3